Home Stories Between us girls, I have a confession.

Between us girls, I have a confession.

by Alana Kayfetz

Between us girls, I want to confess something. People say that having a second kid is hard- well fuck ya. It’s harder than I had ever imagined. Cheers to you mamas of many children- I do not know how you do it all.

Everyone loves a new baby; they want to hold her and cuddle her. Now that the visitors have slowed down and the newness has worn off… For everyone living in my house, the reality of the “new reality” is starting to sink in.

These past 8 weeks since the birth of my daughter Essa have been tough and beautiful all at the same time, like much of motherhood. We are still learning about each other and its wonderful to see her grow.

In my limited experience, everyone is being affected by the shift in my family dynamics. Our 2-year-old son Elias is displaying generally good behaviour but is not always happy about our new foursome. More than anything else, my husband Matt and I are working to keep our shit together. It has not been an easy time for anyone. The truth is that the brunt of managing this shift falls to us moms.

As I sit here and attempt to send this email and nurse my helpless baby at the same time, I have once again lowered the bar for myself and my family. The bar is now on the floor and I am okay with it.

During this “family shift” over the past few weeks, I have also experimented with being the “face of momsTO”. If you follow our Instagram page, you will see stories filled with the daily grind of my life. I use humour to mask the challenges because, as moms, we have to laugh to get through the day. The responsibility of sharing and oversharing the momsTO message- Giving moms a great day- is the silver lining of this new world for me. You mamas are the community that I want to share my life with. MomsTO once again has given my motherhood so much meaning. You are the folks I want to dine with. Drink wine with, Smoke (legal) cannabis with. Drink beer with. Cry with. Laugh with. Be real with. It is this amazing sisterhood of motherhood that gives me the strength to press on, and mom on.

Being a mom is amazing and terrible all at the same time. Being a momsTO mom makes everything so much better.

So, cheers to us mamas this holiday season. Drink some mulled wine, kiss your partner, see a movie, take selfies with your kids. I hope you drink too much, eat too much, laugh hard and sleep well-ish.

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